A surprise!

Today's weather: awful and rainy. Joints reminded me of this all day. Thank you joints for keeping me informed. But I ran anyway. I was surprised. I will preface this by saying that i have slept a total of 8 hours in the past two nights and am starting to really feel it today. I went into this run very tired. I did a couple of practice laps to practice my forefoot strike. Man, it is so hard for me to get that just right since I've been running without doing it all this time. After a few practice laps I started running. My joints were achy, I was sweating profusely for some reason after only a short distance and I felt like I was gong slower than molasses.

One thing I REALLY need to get over is that I tend to not even finish a run at the point I realize I'm not going to meet my goal. I realized today I wasn't going to meet my 10K goal at the 6thK. I was already at 41 minutes. I told myself I needed to finish anyway. When I got to 8 k I was at 52 minutes. Then I realized I did my math wrong at 6k and I totally could have finished in an hour! But I let myself get down about not reaching my goal and I slowed my speed because of that. I really need to get over that. And pronto! That, or get better at math :) I was so surprised at the end of my ran that i was actually running at my goal speed even though it felt like I was trudging through molasses. I think (I HOPE) this means I got my forefoot strike down. I think my legs have been sore as I have been trying to use the different method of running and I was just feeling tired. But the proper running style helped me maintain my speed! What a great day! Then I picked up my kids at child watch and ran a half mile with them on the track. They are freaking fast. I couldn't keep up (really. I wasn't just being nice and letting them win).

In other news: I registered my husband and I for the Tinker Bell Half Marathon in May at Disneyland! It will be his first big race! "Find your inner pixie" they tell him in the confirmation email. hahaha. I'm sure he's going to love that! Later this week I will be registering my family for the family 5k run so that my kids can do a race as well. :) We did that one as a family in January and it was the neatest experience.

Short term goals modified:
1) 10k in an hour
2) teach my kids good running posture and correct style.

As for nutrition, nailed it today! I hope to be able to keep it up!

Tomorrow is conditioning day. Woo hoo. . .  Haven't heard back yet from the Roanoke Elite Athletes Club yet. Maybe later this week. We'll be running as a family now in the evenings and on Saturday's so my husband can get ready for his race too!

Super Sad about Robin Williams today, too. Super Duper sad. I felt like I understood him. I have been so depressed that death sounded as nice and peaceful as a vacation sounds to some people. A drink, maybe. A good book. a long hike. Or whatever makes you think of pure R and R. I would put my head on my pillow and think that death sounded nice and peaceful. That was just in recent years, but I no longer associate with the people who made me not able to live in my own mind. And I am okay now. I actually started running around the time this was happening and found that it helped me cope with the grief these two individuals had put me through. But when I heard he had committed suicide all I could think about was the time when there was so much going on in my mind that I could't live with in there. I couldn't exist as a human being with what was in there, and for a while I wasn't! I was a robot! I hope he has found peace from whatever was plaguing his mind. I was able to find my peace, but it took 2 and a half years. Two and a half years of utter sadness, disappointment, damage, you name it. But I finally found my peace. I kept waiting for these individuals to accept responsibility and thought that was the only way I would find my peace. but I found it through my Savior, Jesus Christ, and through making healthy changes to my life like running. I do feel sad for the families of people who don't understand what it's like to live in a mind plagued by obsessive thoughts that are out of control. But I myself can understand the ones who hurt themselves. I'm not saying it's okay or that it's right. I'm just saying that I know. And I hope he has peace now. I didn't think I'd ever live another day with peace in my mind and in my heart. And I do now every day. But it took a long time and I did a lot of damage along the way.